There must be more than this

There must be more than this.

I know that this is a recurring theme on this blog at the moment but it’s a recurring theme in my life. If my blog doesn’t reflect my life then I’m being inauthentic with you all and I don’t want to do that. Ever.

You see, I know what my problem is. I’m not living my calling.

Why I’m not living my calling is more complicated to explain but it all comes down to this: fear.

It always comes down to fear.

Whether it’s fear of the unknown or fear of leading my family away from our comfortable American lifestyle or fear of being wrong or fear of approaching my wife about it or fear that I’ll fail at following Christ or even fear of trusting God or whatever the fear is, that’s what it comes down to.

I’m afraid.

I don’t want to be afraid any more, I don’t want to waste one more day…. but I’m afraid not to.

My prayer is this and I pray the same for anyone who is in the same boat as me:

Father God, there must be more than this.

You didn’t send your only son to die on the cross for me just so that I can live like nothing has changed. You didn’t find me so that I could go on looking like I’m still lost, acting like I’m still lost, feeling like I’m still lost, living like I’m still lost. You didn’t set me free so that I could hang on to my chains.

There must be more than this
oh breath of God come breath within
There must be more than this
Spirit of God I wait for you
Fill me anew I pray

Consuming Fire
Fan into flame
a passion for your name
Spirit of God
fall in this place
Lord have your way
with me

Come like a rushing wind
Fill me with power from on high
Now set the captives free
leave me abandoned to your praise
Lord let your glory fall

Take my fear and set me free.

Renew my passion Lord. Forgive me, I pray, for my sins against you. Forgive me and relight the fire within me.

I want to serve you with every thought, every word, every deed, every moment, every breath.

Lord, send revival – start in me.