Do you ever hear that still, small voice of God quietly whispering in your ear?
I think I did yesterday… and yesterday, like so often, it was a quiet little voice yet it was so loud I couldn’t miss it!
I read that and immediately started writing a rebuttal post in my head. I’m not upbeat, I battle depression daily, I think of myself as a total failure. I’m supposed to be a pastor but I rarely lead because I’m paralysed by my own fear of failure and total lack of self belief and self worth. Really, I’m not saying this to get sympathetic comments, it’s really how I feel and it is the debilitating disease I struggle with every day.
Before I could sit down and write that post though, I got a random comment from a pastor I very much respect telling me that he reads my blog (which I didn’t know) and likes it (which I was surprised at). It totally caught me off guard and I was left thinking, “Really? Are you sure you commented on the right blog?”
It actually threw me for a moment. He likes my blog? Huh? It only threw me for a moment though because then Michael Hyatt retweeted an old post about creating a life plan (if you haven’t read it, I totally recommend you read it and act on what you read). A life plan? Like a plan for my life? You mean the dreams I dream could become more than just dreams, with a little planning?
“As much as we may hate to admit it, we aren’t able to see the big picture either for our lives and the plans God has for us, but our Father does (and that will have to be enough).
Throw on top of that a post from Bridget Chumbley about Passion and you’ve got a whole array of different messages all being joined together by that still, small, extremely loud voice of God telling me, “Sometimes you need to step back and look at the big picture, or at least at a bigger picture.”
I am guilty of looking too small, of being introspective, of navel gazing and it’s depressing. Sitting here, at my laptop, I don’t really see much happening. I don’t see myself having any effect on the world. As far as I’m concerned, If I had died a year ago, nothing in this world or the next would be different, except maybe my wife and kids would be a little sad.
I think that yesterday God allowed me to face my own feelings and shortcomings and then he hit me with messages designed to drag my eyes away from my belly button and out into the world.
You see, I AM important because I am a part of God’s great big plan. In the same way, you are important too, whoever you are. Seriously, it doesn’t matter who is reading this, you are important to God and he has given you a role in his plan.
I’d love to create a life plan. More importantly though, I’d love to be able to stick to my life plan. I’m great at making plans but terrible at sticking with them. I’d love to start looking at the big picture and acting on what I see. I’d love to feel like I was moving forward, even though I may just have to admit I can’t see the whole picture and have to trust God. That’s better than not moving at all.
I don’t know where God is leading me with all this but I hope and pray that I have the strength and courage to follow!
Do you feel that God is trying to lift up your head? Do you feel that he wants you to live like you’re a child of the King of Kings not a nobody? Or is it just me?